Hilary Mantel’s Beyond Black resonates. The ‘fiends’ who plague the central character Alison are made dust by her determination. She still has access to ‘spirit’ without their foul-mouthed presence. They made me think of the ‘demons’ we say we fight with, who crop up when we start something – who we think are inevitable, part of us – ‘our’ demons.
Like Alison, writers like Hilary need to source the universal, not the ‘dearly departed’ but the unborn, the characters.
As I go back inside the story now, I have a sense of re-entering a world. A world where things aren’t inevitable but dependent on characters’ choices. I have to listen.
Spent a lot of last week trying to re-form; reform? my life. Trying to organise steady income as well as a different way of being. This in order, not only to support my writing but, to allow other possibilities to grow. I seem to be changing.